Why I Make My Bed: 10 Reasons I Keep My House Clean
Do you ever wonder what’s the point of keeping a clean house? Here’s how to find motivation and why I make my bed every day (even if I barely have time).
A while back I shared a list of “simple rules” that I wanted my family to live by–something I was planning to hang up as a little daily reminder. It included things like “be kind,” “eat your vegetables,” and “always do your best.” Funnily enough, the one thing people commented on more than any other was a line I honestly hadn’t thought twice about including: Make your bed every day.
Is this really a novel concept?
I have to admit that I am slightly obsessive about making our bed each morning. And even my husband, who used to make fun of this obsession, has now embraced it. In fact, these days he might be even more obsessive than me!
But it’s not just the bed. Most of the time, our house is pretty neat. Speed Cleaning is my jam–I love doing a quick sweep of the house every day. We also require our kids to make sure their room is tidy before they leave for school.
Why I Make My Bed: 10 Reasons I Keep My House Clean
Until I posted that innocent-seeming list, it never even occurred to me that these habits might be considered odd. Even so, when I really started to think about it, I realized there are some serious reasons why I take the time to make my bed and tidy up each day.
1. It just looks better.
This should be fairly obvious right? Straightened sheets and comforters with pillows in their proper place are far more aesthetically pleasing than disheveled blankets and a pile of pillows on the floor. A sink full of dirty dishes just looks ugly, whereas I could stare at my clean and sparkly kitchen all day long. Likewise, toys and clothes off the floor and put away are so much prettier than things scattered everywhere.
2. I get more done when my house is clean.
Taking the time to focus on putting things in order–especially when I set the timer and race against the clock–seems to jumpstart my productivity. When I ignore the mess and try to work around it, I am more easily distracted by whatever comes my way, and at the end of the day I’ll find I accomplished almost nothing. It doesn’t mean I always keep my house clean, but I do get more done on the days that I do.
3. I’m not embarrassed to have people over.
I love entertaining and throwing parties and get-togethers, & greatly value hospitality. When my house is clean I am more likely to invite someone over on the spur of the moment.
4. I can find things.
This part of my life has greatly improved since our Great Purge in December, when we got rid of SO much stuff. Now that everything has a rightful place once again, it is so much easier to put it away and–surprise surprise–to find things again when we need them.
5. My kids play better.
My children have the incredible ability to make a mess instantaneously. Do your kids possess this talent? Sometimes it seems like they spend their entire day just dragging stuff out so they can leave it on the floor. During our great purge I got rid of 4 huge bins of toys, and there is still more purging yet to be done. I have noticed, however, that when we keep their room clean (and I do make them help with this), they actually play much better. Just like me, they can find the things they are looking for and focus on just one thing at a time instead of being overwhelmed by 5,000 toys staring at them from the floor.
6. It makes my husband happy.
Who wants to come home after a hard day’s work to a house full of chaos? There are far too many days when Husband comes home at 5:30 and the kids are hungry and crabby and screaming, dishes are piled in the sink, dinner isn’t made, and the rest of the house is a disaster. (For the record, he never says anything negative and will dig right in and help with dinner, then do the dishes.) But on the days the house is clean and dinner is made and the girls happily run to greet him at the door, there is an unspoken joy that lights up his face.
7. It saves money.
Taking care of my home and my things means I am less likely to need to replace something that gets lost or broken. When things are messy I want only to escape the clutter, which can often mean going to Target and mindlessly filling a cart with even more stuff we don’t need. When things are clean, I have no desire to be any place but here.
8. I am more creative.
Instead of seeing nothing but the mess, my mind is clear to see the creative potential around me, and my desk and table are clear to spread out and complete a project. Likewise, when my kitchen is clean, it makes me want to cook things! I know this doesn’t bother some people, but I have a really hard time creating anything–or enjoying the process–when I am surrounded by clutter.
9. It helps me get a good night sleep.
There is nothing I love more than crawling into a carefully-made bed. It is so comforting! Rather than needing to wrestle with tangled sheets or scoop up blankets from off the floor, I am instantly relaxed and ready for a night of rejuvenation. Even if I can’t manage to get to the rest of the house, I almost always make my bed because I hate sleeping in a messy bed. A made bed just feels better, the blankets stay on all night long, and I sleep much better.
10. It’s my job***.
When I signed up to be a stay-at-home mom, I agreed to all the duties that came with it, including keeping house. It’s not my husband’s responsibility to go to work all day then come home and do my job too. Yes, I work too, but my “work” is secondary to my primary job of Mom.
This is not a sexist thing. Early in our marriage, we agreed that a.) one of us would always stay home with our kids and b.) that the one at home would be responsible for running the household. In fact, when our oldest daughter was a baby, he was the stay-at-home parent for a year-and-a-half. During that time, he did it all–cleaning, cooking, groceries, & childcare–while I went to work, and he did an amazing job. I owe it to him to do the same.
To summarize, here are the Top 10 Reasons why I Make My Bed and Keep My House Clean:
- It just looks better.
- I get more done when my house is clean.
- I’m not embarrassed to have people over.
- I can find things.
- My kids play better.
- It makes my husband happy.
- It saves money.
- I am more creative.
- It helps me get a good night sleep.
- It’s my job***.
There are plenty of days where my house is a complete and utter disaster. In fact sometimes by the end of the day it is a disaster even when I do spend time cleaning up. And that’s life. I try not to get too down on myself on those days I can’t quite pull it all together, but most of the time I do at least make an attempt. Because, when all is said and done, if my house is clean and my bed is made, I just breathe a little easier.
What would you add (or remove) from this list?
***UPDATE: This post is now a few years old, and while I still agree with everything I wrote, the one thing that has changed a bit are our stay-at-home parent roles. I am now the primary breadwinner for our family, while my husband stays home. That means that he now takes full responsibility for much of the day-to-day cleaning and laundry, though I am still the chief organize and bed-maker! I realize that we are very fortunate to be able to have one parent solely focused on running our home, and this post is in no way meant to be an affront on those of you who work full time and can’t always keep up. Keeping a house clean is thankless, never-ending job whether you are home full time or not. This post was only ever written a reminder of why I continue to work at it, even if it just gets messy again, and meant as encouragement for those of us who sometimes need a little extra motivation to get it done!
Loved this post! Very encouraging and we are like-minded. My husband has a stressful job and the last thing I want him to come home to is a disheveled home. My house pretty much reflects me…I’m more productive and well, just feel alot better about myself when my house is clean and organized. If it’s not, then I’m not! Thanks for sharing.
When my house is in order, my life feels in order and it allows me to to focus on other things.
This is true there is nothing like relaxing in a clean house on the weekend!
Same here! You can focus on more important things…like family.
i think you are soo right when the house is kept clean and things are in place and my bed is made im such a happy person i dont feel upset that someone will come to my house and think wots all this” its easy to find stuff and i think its better to spend a bit tym each day to clean everything then stay in one place and be cleaning that for hours and hours its really deppresing, wen iv had a messy house iv been in one place for 3 hours and when im dun im shatterd and i cant clean anything else,the next day i start on another chore and go on each day doin 1 thing each day, even if ive cooked in kitchn next day i least its not gona take 3 hours to clean but jus 30 minz to qwkli clean and wipe it, keeping on top of things is so easy i only fall back sometimes because i have joint pains and my illness stops me thats why i think doin a bit each day is the best thing i hope my reply helpd out someone out there! good luck
Count me in on the like minded.
My bed is made every day and my 18 year old son (who’s made his bed since he was a toddler) never leaves home without doing the same. I’m with you! And NO dirty dishes in the sink, either!
preech it sister 😉
I’m jealous! I never make the bed. I do like the look and the feeling of a made bed. I will go forward from today and start making the bed. Cross your fingers.
I am obsessive compulsive about my house being clean BUT with 4 kids and 2 dogs my house doesn’t stay clean very long. I do try to make my bed every day and I definitely keep my dishes clean. I strive to do at least 1 load of laundry a day because it piles up super fast if I don’t.
I also have made a chore chart for my kids. Each one of my kids is in charge of a room in the house. My oldest daughter is in charge of making sure the living room is tidy, my youngest daughter is in charge of her and her sisters bedroom, my oldest son is in charge of his and his brother’s bedroom, my youngest son is in charge of the dining room and hall way. None of these rooms ever really get dirty but if my kids do their chores they earn money and special privileges.
Erin~ At the moment you are my hero. I feel the same way about everything you mentioned. But my kids and step kids are not as organized. I need to get my act together. Any advice? I would love it?
stepson – 16 (very lazy)
stepson – 14
daughter – 10
son – 6
Where’s the “LOVE” button?!
Both my husband and I work outside of the home and we have a 2 year old, but I just recently started to really take on the “always clean house” and I can’t tell you how much better of a mood I am in every day when I come home! What helped me a lot was getting rid of the DVR on the t.v.!
Great job Ruth! You’re doing awesome! Even on those days that you don’t feel “awesome” , you’re still doing awesome! 😉
I love your comment about getting rid of the dvr… if you didnt have the time to watch the show or movie in the first place, when would you find the time later? Most anything on tv will either be repeated at a later date or can be found on youtube , netflix or at the video store. My day goes smoother when I dont even turn the tv on.
I kept the DVR because I have what I call TV days where I watch shows I have recorded. I love it that way as I feel ‘safe’ knowing I have a stash because I can watch them on my terms…yep! owning my control freak. I can fast forward through the ads, delete recording if it’s not checking my boxes, gives me free choice [so not into pay TV], it’s always available. I do use the overwrite for some shows as I don’t ‘need’ to watch them but its nice to have one there just in case.
And Anonymous is right if I didn’t find time to see the program when it aired I usually don’t find time to see it’s recording. Funny thing is when I have lots and lots of shows I hardly ever have TV days so when I do I unclutter my playlist in line with uncluttering my life and my house and only keep the best and ditch the rest…nice feeling.
My husband has tv on for ‘white noise’ and to catch the news [the five times a day call to prayer as I call it] and it drives me batty so when he goes out of town for work regularly it is bliss as, other than for my recordings, the TV seldom goes on…gotta love technology when you’re a control freak.
WOW I was totally meant to read this post today!!! I think that would really help me too, to get rid of the dvr!!!! What an awesome idea! I have been saying I’m going to get rid of cable all together- but I can start with the dvr. That way there’s not ALWAYS something on LOL. Thank you so much for posting that 🙂 My house used to always be clean, but the last couple years, not so much. My son left for college and I was injured at work all within 2 months so it has been kind of hard to keep up because I am always in pain.It is very depressing when your house is a mess!! I But I am definitely going to get rid of the dvr- thanks 🙂 And get back to cleaning.
I’m a single gal without kids. I try to leave for work every morning with a tidy home and my bed made. I want to be able to have spontaneous guests for dinner, or just to know that I can come home and relax at the end of a long day in a place that is calm and comfortable. Mess isn’t calm and comfortable for me…and I definitely don’t look forward to coming home to yesterday’s mess. I think there’s such an art to keeping a home….and I really enjoy that.
But I need to pay homage to those of you who work outside (or inside) the home AND take care of kids AND keep your home. Sometimes I feel like all I do is put things away just to stay on top of it….and it’s just ME (and sometimes my boyfriend) at home! I wonder how you all do it with kids…and I have so much respect for you all who do it well.
I have become a better housekeeper now that I am a stay at home mom, interestingly enough. The best part is that the more children we have, the better I am at housekeeping and at keeping them on their tasks. I think this is because if I don’t stick with it, it piles up so fast I can get overwhelmed…easily. No more do I have several hours of uninterrupted time to “catch-up” when I take a few days off, so that knowledge helps me stick to it as well. It has taken me a few years and several kids to learn this lesson and many more. After having our fourth child (in 7 years) it just really stuck and now we are hoping for #5. We have also started to enjoy our kids a lot more, which I don’t think we would have if we hadn’t kept going! I was not a great homemaker when I was single, the need and motivation was not there for me.
I kept a pristine place as a single. I planned to split all 50/50 married both working FT. A few reality-checks later(my chronic injuries + his complete helplessness) & my husband has completed his 7 yr housekeeping self-sufficiency course (while working FT). Had to turn him over to God & not back down. Now he appreciates every single chore he doesn’t have to do himself. Anything I do is amazing and appreciated, and it’s a nice not to be taken for granted. He is also the family chef & loves being useful, creative & appreciated after an easy & enjoyable day at the office at the job he loves. He still leaves dishes in the sink but he just called to ask what chores were tonight & I mentioned the dishes attracting bugs he hawed a bit then said “there’s really no excuse for that”. WOW. To God be the glory.
I love this post! Totally agree with you! I love a neat and tidy house. Sending this link to my sis and mom because they’ve never gotten why I am the way I am about trying to keep a neat house. Thanks Ruth!
Beautiful! I completely agree! I applaud you and I couldn’t have said it better. Thank you for sharing! I am going to pass this along!
Oh wow!!!! I just felt like I was reading my own diary! LOL! Thank you for putting into words what I can never get my super messy best friend to understand! I too have 2 little girls and a home based business based on creating things by hand. If clutter is everywhere, not only am I short tempered, but I get next to nothing done. I need to straighten out my whole house before I can sit down at my sewing machine! Great article!
Have you ever done a post about your routines? The entire time I’m reading your post I’m thinking, “yes! I love that! My husband too!” but the reality is I have no idea how to achieve this. Thank you for a great post – I am sharing it with my sister:-)
Agree! I have been thinking for some time that the best way for me to be a happy. productive SAHM is to have a routine of my own. Like setting my alarm everyday and getting up 30 min to an hour before my kids and getting my day started, maybe a quick workout in and just not being so cranky like when my wake up call is the kids. I would love some guidance about building/setting my routine. Love your blog! New to it and already has been so helpful and enjoyable.
Oh, Ruth! LOVE this! And I am going to share it with my husband…he doesn’t understand why I get so down on myself when I can’t keep the house the way I want it and he comes home to a disaster and then HE has to help with cleaning, the kids, and dinner AFTER working all day long! This totally captures how I feel and why I feel that way. Very well said (as always)!
Great post Ruth! I am trying SO hard to keep a cleaner house but some days it just doesn’t work. I also feel I am responsible for this (not Zack) b/c we also agreed that this was part of my job as a stay at home mom. It just makes it even sweeter when he does the dishes or vacuums the living room…because I’m not expecting it. I have also been trying to make my bed every morning and have watched as my girls have been following my footsteps. They have been making theirs in the mornings as well! Love it!!!
Thank you for this post! I have tried so many things over the years and I just can’t seem to keep my house uncluttered. I know that it affects my attitude and my families. I know the cisual clutter is causing us stress. I know in my head everything that you said, I just need to DO it! Thanks for the reminder and encouragement to make it happen.
Denise
I love this post! I have a 2 year old who also has that incredible talent of destroying my clean house! I LOVE LOVE LOVE the picture of you girl’s closet! I see a project in my near future 🙂
Thanks for sharing!
your post was all I needed today!!! I have been married for a year and a half and I was pretty good in keeping the house always clean and organized, even though I worked part time. Now we downsized to an apartment to be closer to where my husband goes to school and I am 40 weeks pregnant and spent 7 months of this pregnancy dying with morning sockness. sometimes I get very sad thinking that if I cannot get it all done now I’ll never be able to do it with a baby in the house!!! you are always such an inspiration!!! I prayed this morning that something would cheer me up and get me going (you know, at 40 weeks it is hard to get going), and your post totally did it!!!!
Unfortunately I work full time, go to school full time and my husband works full time as well. My house is not where I’d like it to be. It’s messy and after working all day I just don’t have the energy or time even to run around and clean, I make dinner and the boys load the dishwasher (now that I have one), if the dishes sit my dog drags them all over the house and outside, No Thanks! I cram all my major cleaning into weekends.. Make the kids help and then within a day it’s a mess again. Sigh.. I often wonder if I stayed home what would my days be like becuase I’d actually have time to clean! When I had my last son, I was off for 3 months from work and I enjoyed being home. Felt nice to throw laundry in, clean the litter box, wash dishes, vaccuum, etc. without a major rush. But, back to reality.. I don’t have that choice to be a stay at home mom, I have to work. So I make due. This weekend, will be my major cleaning weekend as i have to get ready for my son’s birthday party in 2 weeks. But I also have a 8 page term paper due on Sunday. Again.. sigh.. oh well I’ll get through it! Have a great day!
There are sites all over the internet for cleaning you do in small stages, which take only 15 minutes each day. Even for the busiest of us, that’s not much time (set a timer!) and it will free you up from the massive weekend cleanups, so you have more time to enjoy life. 🙂
I second that, Nana! FlyLady is fantastic, maybe that can help you Debbie. You’ve got a lot on your plate, keep your chin up! Hugs!
I agree!! When I had my daughter and was off my house was so neat. But working full time, pregnant and having a 2 year old, a husband and a 8 year old Boxer Dog…it takes a back seat until the weekend!!! Kuddos to those who make it a priority. I wish I was like that! I love clean and tidy houses! Maybe one day I will get my act together!!! lol
I’m not sure how hold your kids are but when my sons were 5 they graduated to being ‘full fledged family members’. There was a ceremony and everything…. Hence, they started doing their own laundry, load/unload dishwasher, vacuum their rooms, 20 minutes before bedtime all tvs were turned off and they had to clean up their messes/put away toys, etc… At this time they also learned from dad how to help with lawn care on weekends eventually graduating to mowing the lawn/shoveling snow by age 8. No, we are not prairie homesteaders, etc… but I was raised in the Midwest where my dad saw no special treatment between girls/boys. We were all equal and he expected what was expected of him growing up post-depression, where his dad worked 2 jobs and wasn’t at home to help his mom and sisters.
My sons are now 14, 17, and 19… they are completely self-sufficient. At age 10 I could take them to the store with a list and some cash to get some groceries while I did another errand. They can make a bed like no one’s business, cook, do laundry, change the oil in our car, change the blade on the lawn mower… you name it.
My husband left 6 years ago and I was able to still maintain the home because my 3 men just kept doing what they were raised to do… live as adults in this world.
I worked 2 jobs, went to school, and was single but the house was maintained, inside and out. It can be done! Just needs dedication and earnestness from the family for everyone to act as a unit…. I’m now remarried and my husband is amazed as to how my sons just pick up the ball when its handed to them and run with it. No matter what the task, they are up for it.
My oldest is in college and is doing it all himself, financially and dorm-life. He has ‘taught’ other students how to do laundry, ‘cook’ in the microwave, fill out forms, iron dress shirts, etc…
I now work and continue to go to school but my home looks like Ruth’s most of the time. I get up at 5 to get some things done and I am blessed that the 2 sons still at home do what they have been trained to do. They now cook complete meals when I work a double shift and my husband is working late as well. Sometimes they consist of Hamburger Helper and a can of green beans, but it’s better than nothing. LOL!
I wish I could share your post Angela, I love that you all work as a unit.
My goodness Angela, you have put me to shame!! I’ve been a widow for almost 3 years and have 2 boys, ages 11 and 6 and our house looks like a tornado went through it! It’s so overwhelming, as I know the mess is affecting my mood, my productivity and my children’s concentration. Funny thing is my children refer to me as a “neat freak”. I love a clean house. I love a bed that has been made and the smell of clean sheets. I try to clean, but I cannot get through to my boys to pitch in and help. It’s quite frustrating. Your post just proved to me that it is possible!
Angela, I wish I knew how to copy your letter and send to my married daughter. She gets no help around the house (won’t go into why) but she sure could use some help. Your letter might give her some ideas/help. Please advise. Thank you.
I am 67 and retired but making my bed every day has been a priority for many, many years. I too like getting into a made bed at night. A friend asked me why I made my bed since I’d just be getting back into it that night. I felt and still feel just like one of the commenters above that it just feels good to get into a bed where the blankets and spread are where I can just slip in. My problem is my messy husband. I don’t like clutter and he never even sees it! I call his desk the “toxic zone”. Even the grandchildren turn their noses up at it. He is great about taking dishes off the table but he only puts them in the sink! Hello? Put them in the dishwasher!! Yet, he is great about doing things that are hard for me to do….like keeping the cat litterbox clean (I am disabled), emptying the trash, taking the cans out to the street and bringing them back, taking care of the yard and garden….well you get the picture. So I feel petty bringing up his clutter issues. Any ideas for a compromise? Great article!!
Finally, someone with the same issues I have. I like a clean, neat and tidy house. It stays like that all day until my husband gets home. Then there is mail scattered on the countertop, coats hanging on the back of a chair, even though he passes the coat rack as he is walking into the house, newspaper scattered on the couch. We have different bedrooms. Mine is always neat and clean, his is a mess. Uses the end of his bed as a dresser, has 6 drawers of socks, clothes all over the floor. I really don’t care that he works, it is his choice, as we are both retired. It is a part time job. When he takes the trash out to the road, you would have thought he spent the day cleaning. It doesn’t do any good to say anything, as he also have selective hearing.
I feel so bad when I read wives complaining about their husbands. If perchance he should suddenly be taken from you, you will spend your next lonely months wishing dearly that you had him back making his messes. There are so many things that are more important than a clean house!
No I wouldn’t
My husband is the some way but I would miss him terribly!!!!
The “no I wouldn’t” post above totally cracked me up! Luv that honesty!! 🙂
This entire thread made me laugh out loud!!
My husband, whom I love dearly, is the mirror image of the husband described above. In addition, he works in construction and looooves tools, wood and machinery.
My husband went on a guys weekend in July of this year. While he was away, I micro-cleaned out entire bedroom, (I usually only clean my side of the room). By the end of the weekend, walking into my room was heavenly!!!
The scent of clean sheets hung outside to dry filled the room. The dresser gleamed and Windows glistened, stepping over dirty laundry or mismatched shoes was no-more.
I loved my bedroom!!
It’s now November. Four months have passed and the room has been cleaned, bedsheets have been changed, the carpet has been vacuumed, and the only part still attention worthy is my side of the room.
My husband is off again, this time on a business trip.
The dilemma?
Do I kick ass and perform a top to bottom clean out or stick to my weekly ritual of taking care of my side only??
And yes, I’d miss him, but my house would be much cleaner and I’d have much more time on my hands!
Great post! It does take some time to get it together, but once everything has a designated place, it feels wonderful and is much easier to return to a general state of cleanliness. We’re still working on it in our household, but with only 4 more months of graduate school, we’re going to get there!
I have developed the habit of always keeping my kitchen sink immaculate ( inspired by the Fly Lady) but I’m still not so good at making the bed- mainly because my husband wakes up later than I do and he makes the bed.
I too struggle with feeling chaotic when the house is a mess. I can concentrate better when it’s clean…but also struggle with keeping it that way. I actually am mid-organization/deep clean on the WHOLE house (moving is a big motivator), and would love to keep it that way. So far, the rooms I’ve done stay pretty clean. Still have the big ones to do (kitchen, bedrooms, family room), which is a little overwhelming to think about, but ohhhhhh, how I love a space when it’s done! 🙂 That being said, I *do* make our bed every day – it’s probably the most tidy room in our home. 😉
I just saw a utube video of you that someone posted on iheartpublix.com and I am so glad they did, I completely agree with your videos and now your posts as I have just read them. I started two weeks ago keeping my house very clutter free… and it has made such a difference in my life… while I can’t have a made bed, my husband works midnights so he is asleep in it during the day, I do have my kids room, living room and kitchen ten times cleaner than before… I never realized how much time I spent cleaning all the clutter we didn’t need. I have two boys 3yrs and 5yrs… and I have had soo much more time with them!! Thanks for your postings and I will start to follow your page… 🙂
I so need to get in a routing so I am not embarrassed when anyone pops over. It doesn’t happen often, but that fear and panic overcome me when someone knocks at the door. Darn, the floors need to be swept. I grew up in a house that was always spic and span. To the point where my mom didn’t want people to come over and mess it up. I now have to find the happy medium and get my groove thing on.
Same here! We must be twins!
I love this post! I haven’t always kept a neat and clean home, but we’ve just moved into a new apartment 2 months ago, and it has been my mission to keep it as straight and orderly as possible. I’m finding that, as you posted, we enjoy being home so much more when the house is clean and organized. I don’t panic (as much) when guests arrive unannounced, and I’m much more likely to extend an invitation to visit, knowing that I don’t have to rush home to quick clean and make my home presentable.
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I just LOVE this post! These 10 reasons are SPOT ON. Thank you for the kick of energetic motivation for this housewife today. 🙂
Ok, you’re inspiring me to make keeping the house tidy a priority again. It’s not easy with 3 little kids but I’m going to try. And I think it’s time to do some more purging of stuff I don’t use, even though I don’t have all that much in the house to begin with.
I love this! I too make my bed daily…and often wonder why! I think that since we don’t have much in our bedroom, when the bed is made and clothes are hung up, that is one less room I have to tidy all day long. When I don’t make the bed it is one more room that does need to get picked up. And for whatever reason, adding an entire room to the list that needs to be tidied seems to add another thing on the to do list when I could so easily not even make it a thing if I did it first thing in the morning. You are a woman after my own heart! Found this post via Pinterest and will take some time to browse around your lovely blog! 🙂
I feel the exact same way… About all of it. Thought I’m just now getting in the rhythm of things. Thank you for basically writing down what I feel/think!
Thank you so much for this post. It meant a lot to me today. Sometimes between school work, and all the rest of life, it can seem like there’s just not enough time for me to be clean and organized. But in reality, I think I will find I have more time if my home is in order–my life will be more in order too. You’re right that the dividing of responsibilities is not sexist or demeaning in any way. It is easy to get confused about this, and even I have in the past, but assigning certain roles and responsibilities within your home doesn’t mean that you’re incapable of doing anything more spectacular than cleaning or sitting behind a desk 9-5; things simply work better and more smoothly when we know clearly who is primarily responsible for what duties. I love that you mentioned that when there is overlap of responsibilities, it’s not a big deal…just like how you went to work and your husband stayed home, or how he comes home and helps with dinner and the dishes. I think that is an expression of true love. Thank you for your inspirational and motivational post!
I love this!….I make my bed everyday….5 days a week I get up at 5:45 and make the bed right then… weekends it gets made around 10…..It so helps wake me up….We all make sure there is NO messes in the morning to look at… hence…..Pick it up and put it in it’s place. You have good points in all of list. I am not a stay at home mom…but have been a mom for 36 years with 5 kids!….Thanks!
I agree with about 90% of this.
Where I have a hard time are the parts about “keeping husband happy” and “it’s my job.” I understand that being a stay at home mom means more responsibility in housekeeping. This is pretty obvious. But I have found that too many husbands come home to a tidy house after being away all day and don’t fully understand just how much effort goes into making it that way. Then, to “relax” they trash the kitchen, the living room, the bedroom, and the next morning go away to work again. Just like Sometimes I feel like someone needs to tell husbands that just like they don’t like coming HOME to a messy house, wives don’t like to WAKING UP to a messy house and they should be considerate. BOTH of you live there. BOTH of you should put in the work. I’m not saying that you were disagreeing with this, just trying to make it clear.
Also, I do not consider keeping a tidy house a part of my “Mom” job description. I consider it part of being a family member who spends time at home. This means that when my children can help, they will. That on the weekends and at night, my husband helps. I did not become a stay at home mom to keep my house clean. I became a stay at home mom to focus on my relationships with my children. Yes, this means teaching them to work and clean, but this is not the largest part of WHY I do it. If it was, I would go back to work in a second.
Carrie, you hit the nail on the head fr me. I really loved this comment and was wading through all the moments to see if there was someone I could relate too. Thank you!
Thank you, thank you, thank you, Carrie! I am married with four kids who are all active in extracurricular activities, and I have a full time job. There are days when I was a SAHM that I would tell my husband, ok, you stay home, and I will go and only work for 8 hours out of the 24 there are in a day. That would be much easier!!
I agree with you Carrie. I work 30 hours in a job that can be very stressful, take care of a disabled son and a struggling 20-year old with 2 cats & dogs. There are days I want to pull the covers over my head and stay in bed never mind making it! I agree that having a clean and tidy home is good for the soul and the mind, but there are times when I can barely make it through the day or night without some calamity happening. But I start every day with a hopeful heart that today will be the day the motivation kicks in and I can be proud of my home. I do envy SAHM and which I could do it, but also realize its hard work!
AMEN! Before I was a stay at home mom to 3, I wasn’t the only one doing the cleaning. I was teaching full time & we split it then. Now that I’m home ( which having 3 kids 4 & under is what I do ALL day), we both still live in the same house, and we both still use the same dishes, use the same bathroom….The kids clean up their toys, help put away some of their laundry that they can. But never did I say when I was going to become a stay at home mom to raise my kids, that I was going to be the primary house cleaner. That probably differs within each relationship. I also grew up with a dad that did a lot of cleaning and cooking also.
Thank you for this! I thought I was the only one feeling a little insulted. My husband and I also agreed that the lions share of the home would be my end of contributing to the family – but not to keep my husband happy OR because it was my WORK . My job is being a mom – my contribution to the whole of a working family is doing what I can when I can when Im not focused on being MOM. The same goes for him – while his JOB is bringing home the bacon his contribution to the family is helping out in any which way when he can. I am glad that this works for them and they have found something but I don’t think its the model for how things should work – just how it works for them.
I think this Ruth’s OCD has become her new clutter. Her life and her time is cluttered with her obsession with tidiness. I find her writing judgmental and sanctimonious. Quit shaming women that don’t share your obsession. I’m sure that’s not your intention, but that’s what you’re doing. If you’re obsessed with chasing your idea of a perfectly tidy everything, go for it. You wanna take all your kids stuff? Go ahead. But this de-clutter, minimalist, mantra has become your compulsion, just like shopping was. You’ve simply replaced one thing for another. Kids with possessions have no less fun and imagination as yours. Couples in unmade beds have just as much love. We had friends like you and being in their house was excruciating and uncomfortable. We dreaded being there and could never be ourselves. I read everything on your site because I was curious what all the fuss was about. I won’t be back.
Exactly! I’m glad someone pointed these things out that you did. I totally 2nd what you said!
Hey, my husband’s office is as messy as our house. When he cleans his office daily, I will clean the house daily. His job is to work and bring home the pay, my job is to raise the kids and make sure they don’t kill themselves or anyone else. To those of you who can and want to keep a clean house at all times: Good for you! To the rest of us who’d rather not obsess about a spotless floor or sink: keep up the good work!
Thank you! I feel the same way! Yes, I try really hard to keep the house picked up, etc. but I am staying home because I want the amazing relationship and precious memories with my little girl that I didn’t get with my mom. It is my JOB to me a MOM! It is my families job as a whole to take care of the house! My husband can be pretty messy but does his responsibilities and our daughter and I have ours! Works great for us.
YES! Thank you, Carrie. Very good thoughts and responses to this article. I have three little ones with one on the way, and it is refreshing to hear you voice a balancing perspective. I agree!
Beautifully put. Hubby does everything obvious + cooking (his hobby) & I do all the stuff he can’t do..plan, organize, project manage.
All I can say to your reply, Carrie, is, ‘Yes! Yes! Yes!’ and give you round of applause. There were so many points she made that I literally gasped at while reading. Let’s just say, Ruth and I think starkly different on many issues in this post. I still enjoy reading her content though.
Brava! I too keep a clean home. I love coming home and the ahhh feeling that greets me when I walk in the door. I make my bed everyday, put things away and tidy up before I start a new activity. I am okay when I have unexpected company, my place is clean. My friends say my place is zen. Cleanliness is next to Godliness has always been one of my favorite adages. I was called OCD by a co-worker. I asked her what was the opposite of OCD and she never bothered me again.
I agree with your posts and your reasoning. It was refreshing to read and gave me some needed energy to clean my home today. However, I think that most of the comments are being made by people who share your same views. From experience and being in the homes of many people, I know that many people do not have clean homes and may not have it as a priority. There’s SO much good that comes from keeping a clean home but there’s also a limit to how obsessive you should be with it. It can come to the point where others actually DON’T feel comfortable in your home because they are afraid to touch anything and are embarrassed to have you over because they are not like you. I am not naturally a tidier. I have to try really hard to keep my home clean because the little mess (that eventually turns big) doesn’t bother me as much as others. I don’t have a dirty, filthy, or even a cluttered house, but I usually have some dishes in the sink and I admit that I do not make my bed everyday. I am working hard on improving this but during the process I still want to be happy. Everyone has their weaknesses, some more “visible” than others 🙂 I am trying to find the balance because obsessing over cleanliness all day long is not the answer for me. I’d love to hear more about how others balance keeping a tidy home with not being obsessive. I’ve also felt so much pressure from moms who keep their homes super clean. I hardly ever feel comfortable when they’re in my home and when their children are over all they do is comment on my imperfections. I’ve decided that I want a clean home but I also want others to be comfortable around me and not feel judged. Sometimes this means allowing others into our home when it’s not exactly perfect. Anyways, a little bit of a ramble but I just wanted to share my thoughts. I really did love this post and it has helped me, thanks!
I completely subscribe to the importance of making your bed. I think it also (albeit, in a small way) can help with depression. A friend once told me part of depression is feeling like your life is out of control. Making your bed, immediately if possible upon rising, can give you a sense of control of your immediate surroundings. From there, I think it also begets positive ripples of getting other things in control.
I never made my home in any of our previous homes, but then we bought our first home. I finally had space to put all our things, I was suddenly home a lot more hours a week with our second child and I spent time in my room. I don’t completely, “make the bed.” However, I do pull up the covers and sheets to look reasonable now, and I love it. But I think that it is more the life style changes that i love and finally feeling like I fit in the space that I live in.
This is a wonderful article. I have been pinning a lot of your articles on Pinterest. I am really enjoying your blog posts!
I really do make an effort to clean my kitchen before bed. I love love waking up and stumbling into a clean and shiny kitchen with nothing to do but fix the coffee pot until things get hopping. I figure if your main bath is cleaned up every day, kitchen clean and beds made, you are way ahead, and safe if someone drops by unexpectedly.
Oh, my heart skipped a beat on all 10 tips! You put into words all those things people don’t understand about me 🙂 I just don’t function properly in a messy room. I need to pick it up in order to sit down and enjoy anything. And if for some reason the bed isn’t made, I make it perfectly before getting in b/c I just can’t rest in messy sheets and blankets! Thanks for an awesome post and I’m passing this along!
Oh my!! Are we long lost sisters!!? Lol-jk
I am exactly the same way and even tho I work 32-40 hours a wk, on my days off I have to make my bed every morning!! And on the days I work, the hubs makes it! And yes- a lil speed cleaning job goes a loooonng way:) I swear it’s like my morning mantra!! Thanks so much for the great post:) luv it!!
It just smacks of stepford wife to me.
Trying to keep your home tidy because it gives you a sense of calm is being a Stepford wife?
It seems as if you are trying to be cruel because it isn’t your way and that is just unkind.
Thanks for sharing what motivates you to clean your house. I have been a messy housekeeper and wondered what motivated others to keep their house clean. This was very inspiring. I learned several years ago to make my bed before I get up. I am lucky enough to be the last one up since my husband leaves very early for work. It really does make your bedroom look neater. thanks again.
My day just goes better when I make my bed!! 🙂
I love the fact that you listed all the reasons why a clean house is a good thing. I completely related to all of them even though I’d never really thought about it. I love a clean house..absolutely love it. I raised 4 boys, so it was a challenge at times. I find I can’t think clearly when my home is disorganized or messy and I feel like I can’t do what I consider fun (like crafts, crochet, etc.) unless my house is clean first. I always make my bed unless my husband sleeps during the day (shift worker), then I sometimes forget since I don’t always get upstairs during the day. I love a made bed…and even then I’ll make it before I get in it. Is that a little weird? 😉
I cared for my colleagues’ kids full time for over three months while their mother was in hospital and found that everything was better for the exact reasons in your post when I made the beds first thing and kept the kitchen clean and clear. I’ve always been a scrupulously tidy person, but when faced with the challenge of “foster” motherhood to two young children I found myself letting things slide with the excuse that I was just too tired.
One day changed all that though when we returned from dinner at their aunt’s house, I bundled my charges into bed and then staggered out (sheer exhaustion every day, all day) into the kitchen to tackle the lunch dishes. I know, I was a complete delinquent to regularly leave dishes in the sink for hours like that. To my surprise, I found that that one day I had happened to manage to get the dishes done before we went out.
A light went on in my soul when I realized that if I just made the effort to get things done RIGHT NOW no matter how tired I was, it would be SO worth it after the kids were in bed when I could just go straight to relaxing instead of feverishly house-cleaning because I CANNOT sleep if I know my house is a mess.
Thank you for putting all this into words.
Making my bed doesn’t equal a clean house IMO. I clean as I go and then some but I’m not a bed maker. I do make the bed right before bed. I’ve had periods of time that I make the bed every day but I end up having to straighten the covers before bed anyway so I’ve just stopped making my bed.
I make it before bed too and had the same problems of wrinkles during the day or daytime naps with my kids in the bed. I mostly “straighten” it before bedtime though.
I thought I was the only OCD person that did this!! I vacuum my house almost everyday & speed clean just because it makes me feel better (and all the other reasons listed above). I’m a mother, wife, & teacher (so yes I’m tired) but by doing this each day during the week I don’t obsess over it on the weekends. Instead I enjoy fun family time! It’s so worth it.
I stumbled upon this post via Pinterest and am glad I took the time to read it. I don’t make my be every day but on the days that I do there is an extra “Ahhh” when I crawl in at night. Nice smooth sheets are so much more comfortable! And I also want to encourage you by saying that people who react negatively to this are probably doing so out of a sense of guilt or insecurity. If this is how your family best operates then don’t be concerned with unkind comments.
That should be bed, not be!
That’s it…..gonna go clean the house. Now if I could just let the motivation I feel right now fuel me beyond today!
I’ve always been taught that the bed is the first thing you make in the morning, and my mom always does some speed cleaning before she goes to work. Everyday. So for me it is natural, I don’t understand why some people would regard it as something unusual.
I’m currently talking with my boyfriend about how we will organise ourselves when living together, and we both agree that one of us should stay at home, with the kids, etc. and I agree with you that cleaning is part of the duties linked to staying at home, and that the partner that is going to work everyday has the right to return to a nice and tidy home, even when that’s not always possible!
Keep up the good work, you are a wonderful inspiration!
It (my obsession with making beds) drives my husband crazy. We can be running late for church, he has the kids in the car and the engine running and I won’t leave the house without the beds made. But if I don’t I will be in such a foul mood when we come home because all I will see is mess! This is how I was raised and I am not going to change. Plus, a well made bed does so much to improve the appearance of a room. You will never convince me otherwise. I hope you don’t mind, but I think I am going to link this post (if I can figure out how) in my next blog entry. Thank you so much for letting me feel normal about my bed making obsession.
Just came across this, and I love it! As I just finished making beds and tidying up this morning, I can testify that it is a great feeling and start to the day! I always get so much moe accomplished when this is done first thing, along with everyone dressed for the day.
** key words “stay at home mom*
being a stay at home mom has nothing to do with anything. my mother raised my brother and i on her own and engraved it into our brains that we don’t go anywhere until our beds are made. even if the rest of the room is not so tidy, it looks better when the bed is made. this is why i am the way i am and the first thing i do when i get out of bed is MAKE IT! my husband is a marine, so he spent plenty of time cleaning for no reason and is naturally clean because his mother raised him to be responsible. granted, i got the importance of making the bed habit into his system but you can’t just assume because a woman stays at home that she has nothing better to do! if i was on my own, like my mother with 2 kids, i’d still make time because like most of these people… i function better and am just happier when my surroundings are clean and tidy. there are some dust bunnies here and there and i don’t vacumme every single day but for the most part it’s spotless.
Thank you. The hard truth is everyone only has 24 hours in a day and if 9 or 10+ of them are used working outside the home and getting to & from work then something has to give. I’m perfectly fine with my house not being as clean as some SAHMs.
Indeed! stay at home Mom. Do what you can when you can, but not all people are bothered by clutter so it is not ours to judge. Being a loving and caring person is more important than having a clean house.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you! Dealing with huge family issues, overwhelmed I just let the house go. Your inspirational post, is giving my heart a reason to beam and remember how great it felt to have a clean home. Can’t wait to start. God Bless You!
I want to become a clean house mom. This summer I am going to do my best before I go back to teaching.
Good luck Tricia! If you have the summer off my recommendation is to start by PURGING as much as possible. The less stuff you have, the easier it is to keep it all neat and tidy! Check out this post for some more tips on clearing the clutter: https://www.livingwellspendingless.com/2013/03/08/clearing-clutter/
I too believe in making the bed every morning. It just helps me get the day started and makes me feel more organized. I also clean out the dishwasher first thing in the morning and load as we use the dishes during the day. A quick run of the vacuum and my house looks pretty good! I find that when the house is clean life just seems less chaotic.
I am a middle of the road person. i love a CLEAN clutter free house and yet at the same time I love a house that feels lived in. I feel some comfortable visiting homes that look like a family lives in them and my family can come in and join in versus homes that look like a photographer can come in and snap some photos and toss them in a magazine.
I’m so with you on this. Even though some days I really don’t want to clean, I know that if I get it done, the rest of my day feels freed up to do everything else I need. I’ve got two kids under 4 and while they can’t really help yet (besides putting away toys), I feel like I’m setting an example for when they’re older…like my mom did with me 🙂 Great post!!!
I am with you on this and do the 10 things already!!
I love this! I make my bed everyday. I also feel like I am more productive/feel better when my house is clean!
Over the past year, and still going forward, I am working hard on de-cluttering our lives. I’ve been trying to use the motto of, “if you don’t use it, get rid of it. If it’s broken, get rid of it or fix it”, etc. I have to say, It’s nice to get rid of things!
You must be my twin. I never leave my home without the beds being made. And my house is always organized. My husband , children and my closet are even color coordinated. My mind races if my home isn’t tidy. They say one step to recovery is admitting the problem….. I am a neat freak.
I love this post! I love having a clean house, but always lack the motivation. This helps me alot, because its all true! Thanks!
I am the same way! 🙂 can’t stand clutter and make by bed compulsively as you say. Clutter makes me anxious and disorganized.
Thank you for sharing,
Happy cleaning!
~Daria
Sounds strange, I’m sure, to some, but I made it a goal to keep my bedroom simple, stylish and immaculate (bed made every morning without fail) two years ago. I needed an oasis at the end of my strenuous work day and before I made this decision, my bedroom was the catch-all for things in the home that needed to dealt with “one day”. Needless to say, I woke up each morning tired and stressed just looking at the clutter around me. Now that I’ve changed that around, what a huge difference in my mood and attitude!
What a wonderful post – it’s like what my inner self is trying to say and would post. My house is such a disaster and I feel so unmotivated to cook or do anything b/c there’s so much STUFF and it drives me crazy. I like the idea of racing yourself against the clock – that would definitely work for me. Thanks for the list!
I agree with everything you said. I’m a bed-making and a clean house believer. When my son was in high school suddenly I was coming home from work to a clean kitchen. When I mentioned how much I appreciated it he said he started to do it because he noticed when the kitchen was clean I was happy while making dinner. And it was true when I came home to a messy kitchen I got miserable because I couldn’t cook until it was clean. I would clean up the mess that from he, his sister and their friends had left and get more angry by the minute. But when the kitchen was clean I would start dinner and be happy to have a conversation with them about their day. He is now married and keeps a very tidy home, his wife is having trouble “keeping up to his standards” but he is the first to grab the cleaning supplies and get to work. He feels it is everyone’s responsibilty not just the woman of the house.
I LOVE this list! Seriously, nothing feels better than to have a nice clean place!
My husband and I are constantly fighting over the simple chore of making the bed. It’s not the chore it’s that he doesn’t like making it together. I insist that he makes it with me! He calls me an only child! I loved this article and have sent a link to my husband. Thanks
I’m a bed maker. If nothing else gets done at least the bed got made. 🙂
I agree with your blog post so much that I could have written it myself. These are the ‘rules’ I live by & it makes life much less stressful! My motto: A place for everything & everything in it’s place!
Agree with all of this!
I have two “rules” (both of which I break from time to time…)
(1) one project at a time… if I’m doing a sewing project I don’t start gardening until I’ve put the sewing away
(2) clear the decks … before I go to bed I clear things away, clean the kitchen, tidy the living room, put my clothes out for the laundry put shoes away – and choose clothes for the next day. I’ve got this down to a fine art and now can do it 2-3 ad breaks if I’m watching TV.
Makes everything so much easier in the morning!
I am a home school Mum to 14 children and also a Pastor’s wife. It is hard work (some days more so than others) maintaining a beautiful and orderly home, but I love the freedom that comes from that: the freedom to enjoy the home and to share it with those around me. I have adopted the idea that hospitality is to welcome guests as if they are family and to treat family like honored guests. Part of that hospitality involves blessing others with beauty and order.
Making the bed is the one thing I insist upon and am consistent with each and every day!!!! We have a king sized bed so its, what?, 40% of the bedroom real estate… And the primary focus of the room. It just feels better for even just that one thing to be done. 🙂
Great post! My fiancé and I make our bed everyday too, a behavior I gladly adopted from him! And I couldn’t agree more with your reasons why. I feel like it is a precursor to the start of the day, like foreshadowing! Great blog, can’t wait to follow your blog!
I just found this post via Pinterest and it is so true!!! I make my bed 99% of the time before I even leave my bedroom in the morning – even when I was 9 months pregnant (it was the only exercise I got). I am starting a de-clutter/purge of the house and cleaning as I go – feeling better already.
Hi Ruth. I found you on Pinterest. I’m a bed maker as well and agree with many of the reasons you stated. If you don’t have time to put everything away before dashing off to work at least having the bed made makes you feel better. I recently left it unmade one day just to see what a difference it would make. Happy to say I won’t do that again. I like it nice and tidy. And there is nothing better than crawling into bed with crisp clean sheets. I’m curious, are you a Libra? Thanks for the post and the list. 🙂
Hi, this was an interesting read. Since my husband and I wake up at different times I always make my side of the bed if he isn’t awake yet. Hehe! It makes me have a better day I think. 🙂
Loved this post!!! it has given me inspiration that I desperately needed right now. we are getting ready to move into a much smaller place but that will be ours!!! Our very first home. I used to be like you are but somehow over the yrs I have become such a slacker. EVERYTHING you said is TRUE!!!! at least to me it is. i could’ve written this myself a few yrs back and I want it back. I want my life back like this. I have a lot of purging to do before we pack and it scares me yet excites me too, we are also expecting a new baby in 10 wks so I know with a 33 month old and a newborn life will run so much smoother for us if we are more organized especially as I am way more productive in a clutter free environment. thank you so much for posting this and opening my eyes back up to the ways I used to be and feel because I desperately want those back and now is the perfect time to go for it!!!!! oh and ps I do make the bed everyday…I cant say 100% why other than i just like it that way and it is much nicer to crawl into at the end of the day 😉
Love your article. I agree with you. I too try everyday to have my house tidy not just by 5:30 for my husband, but as often as I can(saying that because a constant clean Home is impossible) for my girls and for me most of all, as selfish as that sounds. It is my haven, my work place, my source of joy and where my family should find their peace. So as a stay-at-home mom I agree that a made bed and done dishes is what I signed up for, but not just that, the feelings that come behind living in a home that is clutter free and a safe haven from the craziness that is the world.
Yes! 🙂
I really appreciated this post. There are some simple rules we set, even for the busiest days, that makes keeping the house clean all the time so much easier. Before bedtime everything gets put away – making sure all puzzles have their pieces, making sure that everything gets put in the right bin, etc. [It sounds so tedious, but if you do it every day (and on super messy days, before naptime too), nothing is ever really missing and it takes 10-15 minutes, tops. Sometimes less. And you never have to waste time “deep-cleaning” the toys.] We also make the beds every day. We never go to bed with dishes in the sink. The counters always get wiped down. We never wear shoes in the house, which means it needs mopped and vacuumed less often. If things are very tidy, I can ignore a little dust for a few days, and do quick touch-ups before guests come. It really makes my heart so much calmer!!!
That is a great way of putting it!
I make my bed pretty much everyday….some days that is it. I try to keep the rest of the house picked up, but I often fall very short of that goal…I keep trying to remind myself that, someday, the kids will be grown and I will miss this mess.
That is a great perspective to keep in mind! 🙂
I’ve had some rough years and my house is a mess. I know it affects me mentally, dislike the disorder very much. But, I am so overwhelmed I cant figure out where to start. Help? 🙂
I am working on a series with that exact problem in mind–give me a month or two! 🙂
And I would love to add that it is s good to find someone who thinks like I do!
My husband always complains that if he gets up in the middle of the night to “get a drink” I would make the bed. I am pleasantly surprised to find SO many women who do too! Funny that a statement you made is EXACTLY what I have tried to teach my daughters and daughter-in-laws…”It is my job”! As a stay at home mom / wife it is my job to take care of these things. Quite honestly, I do it for myself as much as I do it for my husband, (just one of my secrets)
I am a stahm of 4,ages 8,3,2, and 8 months. It seems like I go go go all day cleaning up after little ones but the house still never really gets clean. Mainly I try to keep the floors clean, and laundry and dishes done. It’s just not right that I do this all day and then he gets to come home after an 8 hour day and ” put his feet up” so I have to clean up after him also. When do I get to put my feet up? I work twice as many hours as him at least, plus getting up with babies in the middle of the night! The least he could do is pitch in with bath and bedtime and help me clean the kitchen. Then we could both put our feet up!
I have 4 as well Layla and am a sahm with a home business. Our oldest is now 12. What worked for us was me telling my hubby, in a sincere non-judgey way that I was overwhelmed and I couldn’t do it all. It took a few talks, best done without kids around as they can be distracting! I flat out told him “I’m overwhelmed with all my jobs at home. Here’s my list of what I did today. Some of it seems meaningless, like sweeping the floor 4-5 times per day, but it still needed to be done after every time they ate and it still takes time. Playing with them takes time but I want to do it.” I handed him an itemized list including how much time each thing took. I even included “helped kid #1 with potty”. EVERYTHING. He honestly didn’t know how much time everything took or what I did in a day. He was way more helpful after that! I also was able to tell him that I didn’t know how to do some things (his mother is absolutely immaculate) and that I was working on it so I needed some time to learn, and some help learning. It was humbling. We see so many people seeming to be able to do it all. They can’t. Something gives somewhere. We also taught our kids very early to help with laundry, dishes, table setting, sweeping, washing windows, making their bed etc. That has been huge as they got older. I wash laundry during the day then fold it in front of a movie/tv at night when everyone is in bed. It works for me. It will get better. You are in the trenches with all the little ones and this time goes so fast, even though it seems its at a stand still some days/weeks. Ask for the help – our 7 year old loves bedtime because he gets Daddy reading to him. They’ve read many many stories and spent countless hours together that they wouldn’t have gotten otherwise. Good luck!
This could have been written by me!! I feel exactly the same way on all the points you listed. Nothing like sitting and enjoying a neatly kept home.
Oh how I loved this post, I could have written it. Even now that I’ve gone back to work [kids are grown, homeschooling is done] I still make my bed every day, the rest is hubby’s as he’s not working. I can’t even think straight with clutter, let alone create. Thank you for writing this post! [And I totally agree about it being your job….it didn’t kill my grandmother or mum to do it, and it didn’t kill me either, I never felt put upon, just privileged!]
I just came across this page via Pinterest and I have to say, I totally agree with the feeling of accomplishment one gets just by making the bed. However, I have one question that nobody seems to have addressed – what about all the sweat? I’ve always been told that you should let your covers and mattress air out well before making the bed, and if you’ve ever really felt your bedding, I’m sure you will notice a little dampness. Do you make sure that everything is well aired out and dry beforehand?
We have purchased a cover that goes between the fitted sheet and the mattress. I strip it when I strip the sheets. It has really helped keep body fluids (ewww) from getting onto the mattress itself and makes the bed feel so much cleaner!
Hi Rachelle, I recently read Anne of Green Gables with my daughter and learned something about this very thing from that wonderful book! When Anne wakes up after her first night at Green Gables, the brusque woman of the house, Marilla, instructs day-dreamy Anne on how she should start the day properly: “You’d better get dressed and come downstairs, and never mind your imaginings…. Breakfast is waiting. Wash your face and comb your hair. [Put] the window up and turn your bedclothes back over the foot of the bed. Be as smart as you can.” Then after breakfast and dishes, Anne is sent back upstairs to make her bed. After that she is ready for the day. I had never heard of airing out the bedclothes before this, but it is such a great idea!
Finally! Someone who agrees about the bed! I too let it “air out” before going back in and making it. The beds get made eventually, just not immediately! 🙂
I too make the bed every morning, air the house, and do one hour of housework before leaving the house. I have tried Tom
eave the dished in the sink, as my sister does, but just couldn’t. it just makes everyone’s life easier, on 22 mth old already knows that the laundry gets sorted after we get dressed in the morning !!, and that mums duvet get hung over the banister to air.
I, too, make my bed everyday. It makes me feel like I’ve accomplished at least one thing that day and I like pulling the sheets tight so when I go to bed that night, everything feels fresh and crisp!
This is a great post! My mother always told me to make my bed so I can leave the house knowing I have accomplished at least one task. Starting the day out with a freshly made bed helps me keep a fresh outlook. Thank you for sharing!
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Thank you.
Absolutely agree 100% with everything you said there! You’ve touched upon my pet peeve. Have you ever met a person who you admired, and then visited their home to find it dirty and in disarray? Totally destroys their image. Unfortunately, most people don’t get it! Sometimes, when people show up unexpectedly at my home, I find myself apologizing for what I believe to be a state of messiness. Most of them, befuddled, ask, “What mess?”
Yup yup and yup! I couldn’t agree more. We rent our home and my husband doesn’t fully understand my need to clean and organize. He says he’d do more if it was our own home. I get that for the big stuff but the everyday stuff it’s about taking pride in your home. Even if your name isn’t on the deed. A long time ago I 86’d the flat sheet on my bed, long before hubby came into the picture and we still don’t use one. So how easy is it to straighten a comforter and some pillows everyday. It makes the home so much nicer with that simple act. I also agree that I can focus my attention elsewhere when my home is clean and organized.
I completely agree with everything on this list! I want to spend time in a clean house, and I am much more likely to be productive when I dont have the thoughts in the back of my head about when I am going to clean. Thanks for the post-I enjoyed it 🙂
Thank you for this, it is something that I needed to read 🙂
I am so happy I found your web site again. I had been following you a couple years back for couponing things and when I stopped couponing I regretfully stopped following everyone for the same reason I stopped couponing…more time with my family because time with them is priceless and I can’t get even one day back of their lives. But I am so happy to start following you again atleast during my mommy time! Thank You for being an inspiration to other moms and dads alike! God Bless!
So happy to have you back Amber! 🙂
Love your attitude, especially about division of labour in the home. Too many women devalue their husband’s work outside the home, whereas this is what keeps their home ticking over financially… And it’s tiring – neither should have to routinely do their job and then the other’s job as well.
Love this Ruth! Esp number 10 – my husband works hard and deserves a nice, decently clean and organized home when he returns. Plus, I just function better in a well-0rganized and picked up home!
Blessings,
Nicole @ WKH
I always make my bed in the morning and make sure the apartment is clean before traveling anywhere. Nothing beats coming home to a welcoming, tidy house!
I found this post so late! But I make my bed everyday. I also clean my house (tidy up) everyday. This article speaks to me.
Great post! Fully agree. On your last point, however, I’m not a stay at home mom. But, you know what, even though there was no agreement, no decision of who stays in, who works out, my decision was always to take care of my family (even knowing that it includes making the bed and cleaning up the house 🙂
I’ll add another reason to make the bed every morning. It teaches by example. It shows your children that no matter what happens during your day, somethings always remain the same 🙂 Another day comes, you wake up and make your bed…
I raised 6 kids…we all made our beds. It was one of their chores. I am an early riser and use to joke that I got myself dressed, dressed the house and then got the kids dressed. It just helped to start the day ready. It was always busy and starting out this way just felt good, gave me a feeling of staying ahead to accomplish the demands of the day. I could enjoy my family more. When my oldest was in the 2nd grade, she came home and asked why she didn’t have chores. Making her bed, getting ready for school and helping set the table for dinner was just part of her routine that she didn’t realize it was a chore. 🙂 It was nice to hear that she didn’t think of it as a chore.
I’m 66, My mother told me that if the beds are made, dishes done, and dirty clothes picked up, Then the battle is half won and your ready for company. Pretty much worked for my life. I always had some sort of hamper in every bedroom and bathroom. Taught husband and kids that it takes no more energy to put dirty clothes in hamper than on the floor. It works and my daughter-in-laws thank me to this day and their kids have learned the motto also.
My Nanny (grandma) use to say “a made bed looks the room look clean even if it’s not.” I thought I was alone in the bed making world and I’m so glad to know I’m not. I do my 30 minute speed clean before bed and waking up to a clean house starts my day off right. It allows me to spend more time with my amazing hubby and focus on filling our lives with positive things like home cooked healthy food and time spent doing things together that we enjoy like walking the dog, playing board games, cooking and golfing. Thanks for letting me know I’m not the only one out there with a strict cleaning routine and feel free to stop over to The Marie Project any time. I know Ill be back to visit 🙂
I love everything you said! I work full time and my husband is so helpful and wouldn’t be mad if I left the house messy but I do it for my own sanity! Love it.
I completely agree with you about making your bed , I have to always have my bed made , my one daughter does hers 70% of the time and my other daughter 10% of the time, their rooms they can keep how they like up to a certain point, they are big so it’s up to them. I can’t walk past my unmade bed and feel OK about it, I also make sure they whole house is presentable not perfect but tidy and nice, it just makes me feel better overall.
Chris
I am SO glad I am not the only one who thinks like this! I ALWAYS have to have the house in order!
This was exactly the post I needed to read. I related to each 10 topics. I grew up in a very cluttered home with frequent dirty dish piles. I struggle with housekeeping daily and really do enjoy a clean clutter-free home. I am a creative person and a stay at home mommy with a part time night nursing job. On my days off I “frantically” craft and hope that my DD naps just a little longer. Usually she wakes the 30 min before my husband gets home and I am not able to pick up my stuff or house like I thought would be able to. Thus, he comes home to a dirty unorganized house with no dinner started. I needed this inspiration so much! Thank you, thank you!
I agree with almost all of what was said……but as a SAHM of a 3 1/2 and 7 month old, if I did not expect my husband to help out with keeping things tidy, our house would not look the way it does. Yes, he works outside the home everyday, but why is it ok for him to be “done” with his day, and my “job” continues 24/7? It is a partnership, and a combined family effort to help keep a home looking presentable and comfortable. I firmly believe that most of the responsibility is mine, that includes delegating what I may need help with in the evening and weekends. My mindset has always been, whoever stays at home, helps steer the boat. I think of my job as a”SAHM” as home manager. 🙂
I put this article on my favorites bars and when ever I am on the internet, avoiding cleaning, I will read it, turn of the computer and get my cleaning done! Thanks!
Ruth, your article is not only inspiring, but filled with wit and wonderful advice. Funny thing is, I was searching “how to write a letter requesting sponsorship”, and came across your blog -go figure! Your title, “Living Well/Spending Less” and warm smile inspired me to read on. I agree with you 100%. I too can’t stand a messy bed. And although there have been times when I run out the door without making the bed, I still do it before going down for the night. (Me and wrinkle sheets don’t do well together…lol). That goes for the rest of the house. If my house is in disarray, I can’t think clearly. Dirty dishes left overnight in the sink, depresses me in the morning. For those of us with kids, I believe it teaches them structure if the house is all picked up when they come home from school, and it is likely they will conform to those examples in their adulthood life. My mom used to say, ‘if the house is neat, it gives the impression it’s clean’. I needed a tini-pick-me-up today, and I can honestly say your words did just that. God is Great!
*smiles* You are probably sick to death of any ‘bed making’ discussions by now so I’ll make this quick. What you wrote really hit home. It gave me the ammunition I need to take the time to re-prioritize my morning routine. I now allot a few minutes each morning for plumping pillows, smoothing sheets, straightening shams. Basically fussing over how the whole thing looks. Most important? The area is clean and clutter free to start my day. It DOES make me feel good, QUICK TIP THAT HELPED ME: It wasn’t until AFTER I decided it was time to buy a new comforter set (new attitude needs new sheets and bedspread right?) that I finally realized just how ridiculous my old comforter set was. It was way way too complicated. They have sets now that practically make themselves. ARGH! Why did I wait so long! 😀 Three big pillows, reverse side accent color, fluffy material that lays perfectly. I just want to smack myself. Thanks again.
I just came across this post on Pinterest. I really enjoyed it! New follower here and I hope you will check out my blog. I am not good at making my bed everyday but I really need to be. Once I get into a routine of doing it then I will continue it. We just moved into a new house so I need to get it organized and do some purging. Thanks for sharing! I’m inspired!
Making the bed is a MUST! It make the whole room look cleaner. And it’s easier to get into bed at night when the sheets are straightened, then when they’re all in a ball.
My children loved the magic of helping me float the sheets and blankets down to make the bed, was a special thing we shared. When they had a bed of their own for the first time, they enjoyed making it and proud.
The cleaning and clutter were taken care of in stages. I would be washing a load of laundry while getting myself and the children fed and ready for the day, hang laundry to dry inside right before we left. If I was cooking, I was also cleaning in the kitchen and possibly had a load of laundry running. While we were eating any meal, I most likely had laundry washing or drying. The dishwasher was running while I bathed the children and got them ready for bed. Right before you ate any meal or went out, the children had to pick up and put away toys, and wash hands. That is three times a day right there! If they grumbled about how many toys they had to put away, I would remind them to only have the toys out that they were playing with and it would not be so many. It would give me a clear chance at sweeping or vac, with no obstacles! Hope this helped!^^
Thank you. I thought I was compulsive crazy. Even though my children were raised to keep their rooms neat and tidy. Their own homes now are crazy wild. Beds never made, closets a mess, toys everywhere. Dust that has been there long enough to make a dust man. Bathroom mirror snowy white at the base of the mirror.
Am not crazy. Every where I go I see filth. Broom in hand thanks.
@ Suzanne .. oh, I had to chuckle when I read your comment. I mean that in such a nice way..it was so humorous even though you said it so matter of factly. Dry and real , at the same time… I still am laughing inside over the sentence about the ‘ dust been there long enough to make a dust man’..! I had not ever heard that term, will commit to my repertoire of words. ..thank you ! God bless you, hang in there…you are NOT compulsive crazy.
A few weeks ago, we needed to flip the mattress and put the bed skirt back on that I had taken off to wash a few weeks ago. I went ahead and made. My 2 1/2 year old daughter climbed up and said “oh, I like your bed! It’s pretty! and started jumping around”
She was so excited! And I realized that it was unlikely she had ever seen our bed made before. My husband works nights, and it seems as if someone is always sleeping, or just about to go to sleep.
It’s funny, the sacrifices we make. Mine is that my bed is never made, as we can’t afford to life on one income (Neither of us has a degree), and to avoid having to put our daughter in daycare we work opposite shifts and split all the child care and house work. I am a clean, organized person, who has had to learn to let things go. Some nights I choose to cuddle up with my daughter and ignore the mess, but many nights I make a game out of her being my “helper”.
You are very lucky!
I could not agree more! I have 6 kids, 2 dogs and both my husband and I work full-time. Keeping a clean house helps me be a better mom. I take the time to play games and read to my kids because I’m not distracted with the clutter.
Hi, thank you for writing about this…I agree with you about keeping a clean, organized home. I would like to do the same, only am having a hard time getting started. I guess Im a bit overwhelmed and feel bad about getting rid of GOOD things.
I love this post! So encouraging. I am ready to purge and get organized!!
Feels like all that came out of my mouth! Weird.
I really needed to read this for encouragement this evening. After putting all the children to bed I cleaned house and it feels good to just walk around the house and not step on some toy or see the piles of laundry on the couch waiting to be folded.
When my husband and I married 35 years ago we agreed that the last one out of the bed each day would make the bed. We have yet to have a single day with an unmade bed!!
My ocd wont let me Not make my bed
So, I don’t actually make my bed every morning and tbh my house is typically not the most organized 🙂 That being said, I have no problem with your choice to be more organized/tidy. I wonder however, why you felt like you needed to justify your actions?
I wholly disagree with this premise. This will tell you the scientific reason to not make your bed everyday… Maybe ever.
http://everyoneisstupidbutme.com/rants/make-your-bed/
I agree with the 10 reasons but a little unsure why your husband would quit a good job so you could write a blog?
Up until this year we’ve lived in pretty small apartments. If you stood in any room you could see our bedroom. because of this I became a compulsive bed maker. Now that our master is upstairs I find myself letting the bed making go more often, but I completely understand the freeing feeling of knowing anyone could walk in and I wouldn’t be embarrassed or shy about taking them on a tour.
Thanks for the post. I’m going to check this challenge out!
I also can’t stand the sheets and blankets strewn about. For me, making the bed isn’t primarily a tidiness thing (though that is is side benefit)… It’s really a practical thing, because as you said, it just makes for better sleep. Who can get a good night’s sleep when the sheets and blankets are slipping about–one leg cold and the other warm–pulling about the covers at 3am? My hubby is also a middle-of-the-night sheet stealer and both of us tend to toss and turn. Having tucked in sheets tightly tucked keeps this to a minimum. With an infant at home and another on the way, I need every bit of shut-eye I can get!
Thank you for writing this I can now explain to my other mommy friends why my house looks the way it does! They think I have OCD but I know if you really looked my house isn’t as clean as it could or should be. I was a real estate stager for 5 years and I just feel better with the house being ready for anyone to come by at a moments notice. Good to know that I am not the only one!
I’m 60 yrs old – I don’t make my bed and I have dishes in the sink – I in severe pain most of the time. But if I want my house clean – I just hire someone to do it – I would much rather sit on my back porch with a nice cup of tea watching wild life or spend time with my friends shopping or going to play. Life is too short to spend it cleaning all the time.
I completely agree with all of the above. It’s not easy and I get so frustrated with my husband if he ever says anything. but one, it is my job. I’m not only creating the atmosphere for my family but I’m also training my children on what is acceptable. I grew up in a messy house and it was stressful and depressing. I want my home to be cozy and comfortable. while my home is not spotless all the time, it get’s cleaned 1-5 times a day. I have 3- going on four kiddos, and I homeschool, so we are always here to make messes (my toddler’s favorite pastime), but all those little hands can and should be taught to be helpful as well. everyone is happier in a clean home. I want my home to be a place where my family wants to be- especially my hard working husband. great post- thanks!!
I love this article. Cleaning house has become a hobby for me. I used to be very messy and unorganized but I had to stay awhile with a friend of mine who was in the military and extremely organized and clean…so I had to learn to follow suite real quick! I do enjoy the feeling of knowing I will ALWAYS come home to a clean house, made bed, sparkling kitchen, and fresh smelling air! I do not have a spouse or kids but I do have a small dog, so staying on top of cleaning helps to keep his hair off of everything. But yes, I LOVE my clean house. It looks like something out of an HGTV series 🙂 a clean home is a healthy one!
I have the problem I am sure lots of working women have: trying to keep it all together! Either the house is put together and my work suffers, or vice versa. For the most part the house is semi together and work is semi – kept up. Any tips for balancing both or know any blogs of women who do? Especially since we are praying a baby will join the chaos in a year.
One. Step. At. A. Time. Truly! Pick a task, do your best, and work through it. Then do it again and again. Perhaps set your alarm for 15 minutes earlier, and see how much you can get picked up around the house in 15 minutes! I know this is a struggle many women have, and the trick is to just keep at it!
..I loved reading this . I was taught – by my late Grandmother- that this is/ was known as being ” House Proud’, and I will always remember that.She said if one spends the time to make the bed, pick up objects , keep things put away and spend ONE to TWO hours one day of the week on thoroughly cleaning ONE room, and the next day, another room… your home will be clean almost ALL the time.No worries about someone dropping by without calling, or that you are in a cleaning frenzy because Aunt so- and s0 or your friend from out of town is coming to visit. Having been employed as a Personal Housekeeper/ Assistant and having also been a Specialized Housekeeper in Dental Practices and a Veterinarian Practice…cleaner and organized is always better. 🙂
I also had 3 daughters at that time, and teaching them how to keep things neat and clean and organized seemed a bit of a small challenge;starting in 4th – 5th grade, I even organized their clothes by color in the closets. OH, how they did have a disdain for THAT, at the time…; Fast forward to YEARS LATER, as young women…over 18…and VOILA` ! Guess what??? ALL of them do this…they have their closets so organized, by color and so on. It warms a mothers heart, I tell you…! * smiling*
I cannot stand my house in a mess. I had much rather you catch me in my bathrobe than my house in a mess. I am very picky about a mess, clean it up when it is mad, do not leave a mess and have to go back to it. Of course make the bed and that bedroom looks much better…. I am very particular about my house….. Most men like that house cleaned up.
I too make my bed everyday.I just feel better when I do.It doesn’t take that long and it gets you started to throw in a load of wash,do some dishes, pick up a room,and when you finally do sit down ,you can look around and count your blessings.Works for me hope it will work for you too.
Judy
Making my bed daily & NOT leaving dirty dishes in the sink are the last vestiages of housekeeping that I hold to these days. I am 63 & 1/2, working fulltime with fibromyalgia.
I love a clean house. Come on over and show me how it’s done! 😀
Actually, I grew up in total filth and often do not see messy. I do appreciate sanitary, though, so although I do not, umm, dust as often as some, I do scrub more often that people can believe, and my windows, for some reason, are important to me. I usually sweep the whole house only once a week and some rooms not that often. So I guess it’s important to me, but so is writing, speaking, etc. Hard to figure where the balance point is…
I do agree to some extent. I also spend about the first hour and a half cleaning and then spend time with the kids. I am more creative, generally, when things are tidy. But as a mom with three kids 5 and under I also think some of it has to do with ones personality. I am creative-I have a background in art-and I have found if I allow my kids to be creative-it is never going to be clean all the time. I have found families who don’t let their kids paint, play with playdough, create etc.. do tend to be cleaner. I would rather allow my kids use their creativity instead of having a perfectly clean house-which I don’t think you are expecting it to be perfectly clean though.
It’s aesthetically, not esthetically. Check your grammar with the same effort as your bed.
This is one of my favorite posts of yours. I always reread it and still get so inspired by it. I have made up my bed everyday, except for. One day back in April 2013. So thank you for your continued inspiration. God bless.
I enjoyed reading your post – I don’t make my bed before I leave in the morning (my husband is on 2nd shift, and reaps the benefits of sleeping in). However, it is one of the first things I do once I get home and let the dog out. Even when I’ve come home late after catching dinner with friend – I’ll make the bed at 10:00 at night – it’s always made!
My granny told me (since I was a little girl) that if you make your bed everything else in your day will look better. It’s so true! Also, clean and tidy is good. I’m no pro but I do think we are to keep things orderly.
Thanks so much for posting this – As the divorced mom of a twelve year old, I can relate to and appreciate most of your post, but keeping a man happy isn’t one of my current concerns (smiling). I’ve replaced that reason with this: I am so grateful to find myself with the means (I’m a high school teacher) to support myself and my daughter. Being able to afford a house is a huge part of this. Our house isn’t big or fancy or perfectly clean, but it is our safety and sanctuary. So I make an effort to keep it nice every day because I’m grateful for what I’ve got and I’m smart enough to realize how different my circumstances could be.
Working on day 8 of the challenge. Enjoyed reading your post of why I make my bed. Thanks! 🙂
I came here to read your very helpful information on how to get started couponing.
Then read your article on housekeeping.
As my grandmother used to say: “Housework is only noticed when it hasn’t been done.”
Both my husband and I work, but leaving our house in the morning knowing that all of our beds are made and that our house is somewhat clean and in order makes me want to come back home and enjoy what to my family and I is our paradise. I love having a clean and organized home but having two kids and two working adults at home who a clean and organized home can be challenging. I want to make life simple, and by simple I don’t just mean work free. I mean I want to spend more time at home with my children instead of chauffeuringmy them around from one activity to the next. I want to enjoy my children, pay with them, build, pay pretend, take walks with them, do the things they really matter in life. I am ready to kiss good bye to extracurricular activities and enjoy my children instead of paying others to enjoy them. Reading these articles was very informative.
There are a lot of us out there, huh? I have followed each of these rules most my life. the only exceptions would be when I was literally incapable. I have been chewed out before for doing these things while being sick or hurting. I JUST CAN’T FUNCTION. I could go on about this topic but I think it’s covered. LOL
Thanks for sharing!
While I prefer a tidy home for my own calming existence, my husband and youngest daughter are anything but neat and I don’t feel it is “my” job or my oldest daughter’s job to maintain our home. I work more than full time in a professional career and my oldest daughter has significant academic commitments to achieve career aspirations of her own. That being said maybe a few articles with ideas and expectations that the entire family is responsible for their environment would be a little more appropriate in this day and age.
I make my bed every day, but it has nothing to do with dishes in the sink or toys on the floor…or maybe it does. I’m a busy stay at home mom too. I have a preschooler, a toddler, and one on the way. So maybe when I go to bed at night, the house isn’t all neat and tidy. But at least I know one room is. It’s MY sanctuary. The place where I can close the door to the rest of the house and relax. My bedroom. With all it’s pillows and throws. My husband always complains about having to throw off 6 or 8 pillows before getting into bed. But at the end of the day, after making the meal, cleaning it up, getting the kids baths, teeth brushed, Jammie’s on, stories read, snacks given, water poured. Ahhh, my bed and all the pillows, so serene, so quiet, relaxing. It’s definitely worth making my bed everyday!! Forget the dishes, thank God I don’t sleep in the kitchen!! 🙂
I love this! I know our bedroom stays clean when we make the bed. I like the one hour of speed cleaning! Definitely going to be implementing that one!
I am reading this and all I can think is oh my gosh, did I write this? LOL! Your life sounds a lot like mine only I am still working at trying to take control of the cleaning. I totally agree with you that this is my job and sometimes I feel like I am doing a bad one! But I am glad to see there are other people out there who are a lot like me and are making improvements in their life. Thanks for the inspiration!
I’ve read about 6 of your posts tonight and they have motivated me more than you could possibly imagine! I have even started working on some things! Thank you!
I make my bed EVERY DAY. Our bedroom is visible from our living room and if anyone were to come in and see my bed unmade, I would feel like they are looking at my underwear!! Yes I know my husband thinks I’m koo-koo!!!
i once had a college art professor who told the class, “the secret to a happy life is to make your bed everyday!” he went on to explain the reason for this is that no matter what the world slings at you during the day, or how good or bad your experiences are, if you make your bed in the morning before facing the world you will always have a neat, comforting nest to return to, whether to celebrate or cry. this has stuck in my brain and for all these many years i have found it to be true! also as a child i can remember my grandmother reciting her housekeeping mantra: “if the dishes are done, the beds are made and a path is plowed thru the clutter, i am happy with my home!” 🙂
I actually don’t care whether or not my house is spotless. I love being able to let my kids be kids and mess up anything and everything without feeling like I have to have a “showroom”. I don’t care if 5 loads of laundry is on the couch. I want to spend all the time I can with my kids while they still want to spend time with me.
Love this! I just thought I had a serious case of OCD. I am addiment about the bed made and speedy clean the house as a daily routine. I also have my kids pick up toys before they can get to eat or have a snack or play outside or before anything fun they are looking forward too, it’s just how we function. I’ve worked full time with a deployed spouse and maintained the home and same routine as well as been a stay-at-home mom and maintained this same lifestyle. It can be done. And I agree I feel much better and can relax better when things are in order. I have three children two of which are 15mths apart.
I’ve always been the same way now my kids are grown and they are clean and keep there house clean people would criticizee but now thry have there own and they take care of it and 4 of themn
are men lol. Nothing wrong with keeping a house clean.
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I leave my bed clothes
open it must be aired all day
For those who have children is good to teach them to clean after themselves. Ihad 7 kids my first five were boys and they all learned to cook, clean, at an early age it very important and good to have a clean house there’s no excuse.
I agree so much with the clean home theory. I had a very clean and organized house. I was a single Mother working part time. That was all I could handle. Money was tight, I had 15.00 a month cash for extras every month after the bills were paid. Money was very tight, but we were happy. I spent s much time with my Children and my house was so organized. Then I met my husband. He came with 4 children. I didn’t know if I was coming or going. My house has not been organized or clean since then. he’s the best husband. He helps in many ways. Brings me break fast in bed. does dishes, laundry( if I let him), but that’s something Im fussy about. He has a job working away now for weeks at a time. I am hypothyroid and have adrenal fatigue. This makes one very tired and weak. Keeps your blood sugar too low, and mental function very low, very cold and low blood pressure. that zesty person that you were……..isn’t that zesty. I thought that if I went and went full throttle I would get it done. It seems that I have been trying for years and still just barely making it through the day. I should have purged the house years ago. Everytime I said we are staying home tonight and doing nothing but cleaning something would happen, or it was something like a chorus concert, family reunion, someone got sick and had to be taken care of, relatives stopped by…..
I stopped answering the phone because I was embarrassed by the house. I started screenin the calls, caller I d. If it was someone that I knew would want to stop over, I didn’t answer it. I know this sounds sad, but it was a survival mode. I was stressed day and night. all I thought of was how am I going to clean this mess. My bed was hardly made. dishes always in the sink. toys all over. I heard comments from some people about the house. that made me withdraw even more. People kept asking me to watch their children, wanted to come over to use the pool, wanted me to help with activities and it was so hard. Never did they offer to help out. I felt that I couldn’t give much more. I was so tired from the thyroid and adrenal issue. I just started to become a hermit. I have very shallow friends I think, and family isn’t that much better.
I knew there was a way to get on my feet and finally got to an herbalist. I work now but am not all the way fixed. My house still isn’t good. I still don’t have get togethers. But I am trying. I really love a clean house and I feel happy in one, but I don’t like it when people make comments about the mess. They don’t know what it’s like to not have energy. To wake up in the morning with blood pressure so low you can not stand with out your head ringing and feeling too weak to make it to the kitchen to cook. Your legs feel like they wont move. The thought of running around with a dust rag and sweeper after breakfast isn’t something I can even pull off. Walking to the cellar to put a load of laundry in is hard then back up the steps. It’s hours before I can make it down to the dryer. And if they get brought back up to fold the same day , then it’s a good thing and at times I make it down to do three loads. But then the rest of the house didn’t get much done. The dog needs taken out, the mail needs gone through, garbages need taken out, recyclables need taken to the carport, or taken to the reclying center. Furniture needs vaccumed( white cats), I don’t know how to get it to where every thing unnecessary is out of here. I have been trying but just haven’t felt that great lately. I work part time and that is a tiring job. I just wish people would not judge. I am a good person. I look out for others welfare. I give my time and money to help others. I drive people that don’t have a car. I help the new people at work because they don’t have a clue what they’re doing. I help stray animals where I can. I donate food for them and at times I donated time, even in harsh winters. Its sad when people think my house is this way because I don’t care, or that I’m lazy. I decided that by spring I am going to have it done. I am donating all of my time to cleaning and getting rid of everything. I hate to throw it away, but Im doing the best I can to donate it
This took the thoughts right out of my head, every single one. I blog about this in segments, but this is a really nice compilation that lays it all out. I do a 30 min clean up each night and keep the little things (for the most part) clean throughout the day for, yes, all of the reasons. Now, I look back and wonder why I didn’t do things like that sooner, considering it takes next to no time to do it that way throughout the day and cuts out tons of chaos and stress.
I think I happened upon your Pinterest a week or so ago, but have only just started actually exploring your blog, and I want to thank you for what a blessing it is, and you are. I read your story and was almost in tears, but the happy emotional kind where it’s just a little overwhelming, in a good way, to see how great God is.
Over the past month or so, I’ve started blogging. At the same time, it’s started encouraging me to be better. It’s encouraging me that life can be better. My fiance and I are living paycheck to paycheck right now, and I hate it. I’m the saver, he’s the spender of this relationship, but I’m at home due to health stuff at the moment, so he’s primarily the one with the money in his bank account.
Your blog is encouraging me to encourage him and I love it. Thank you thank you thank you.
#10 of this post was a big, challenging smack in the face. I’ve been meaning to do an ‘Autumn Clean’ (I’m in Australia, it’s heading into the cold months) and get the house back into shape so that my love’s face has that look of relief and joy when he comes home and doesn’t have to do any more. Thank you for the slight kick in the pants, it was needed and is greatly appreciated.
Clean house for me is priority. Everything has a place and when it’s tidy I feel I can concentrate and work properly. Whne you work from home, which I do full time. It’s hard to ignore the mess, and I simply can’t concentrate when I know that the kitchen or even my office desk is messy.
Keeping it clean helps me relax and actually enjoy the space and live and work in.
This post is a godsent. I don’t like to flaunt this, however I grew up in a home where these values were not valued. My Mom worked as well as my Dad and in general my Mom just had a hard time doing the “homemaking stuff” and she is the first to admit it. I have since grown and gotten married and I refuse to have my home be the home I grew up in – there is too much chaos and no one wants that. I have noticed over the years that that chaos BECOMES you and you constantly feel out of control, frustrated and there is not peace in the home. Thank you for this post because it spells out everything I want in my future in a format I can follow and continue to look back on. I feel this will help me to set goals, reach them and continue to progress as a wife and a mother. Thank you for your inspiration!
As a homeschool mom, I can’t completely get on board with the whole idea that the house and everything in it should be the sole responsibility of one person. That’s idealistic for sure but in terms of implementing it, virtually impossible. I have several full time jobs a day which include educating my 4 children, caring for them, teaching and guiding them in spiritual matters, feeding them which includes cooking, organizing their things/my things, yeah making the bed too. Just because I stay home doesn’t mean the mister doesn’t need to do anything here. I can’t take care of everything, ‘Supermom’ is a horrible myth that tells women they need to live up yo everyone else’s expectations in every arena of her life and never need any help . God tells us to be humble and to admit when we are weak. But yes, I agree on the bed being made and the clutter being culled but it isn’t just my job.
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I’m totally the same way. Every day I take the time to make my bed, get all of the dishes and counters cleaned up, and pick up toys. I can’t stand working in clutter and mess. It drives my family nuts that I’m dusting or vacuuming something every day, but when you’re home all day, you deserve a comfortable place to be and work.
You may not still read these comments but let me just say I am a newbie to the housecleaning scene. I grew up in a very untidy home. My mom suffered from her troubled childhood and didn’t show her children how it’s done. I will be 40 this year and for the last couple of years have FINALLY figured out the key to a clean home. “Little.” I mean literally it’s the little things that keep it clean. Not eat off the floor immaculate clean but clean enough I can sleep at night or clean enough that I WILL open the door when a friend stops by. This is an amazing feeling to me. I have made countless lists and stuck to them for about 2 days then give up because it just wasn’t perfect. Then after going to a friends home (which is large, new, filled with beautiful furniture, and always clean) and seeing it dirty for the first time I changed. She said, “excuse the mess. ” then laughed and was only slightly embarrassed. Why? Because she knew it wasn’t like that every day. I had just happened to come by on a crazy day. I realized that it’s ok to not have my house perfect ALL the time. That’s life. Now I take a more humble approach to my home. It’s clean almost every day. But even on the dirty days it only takes about 20-30 minutes to be company ready. And if friends stop by I try to have them over again for dinner so they can see yes, my home does get cleaned. I feel free!!!!
I know that feeling Melynda! 🙂
Thanks for the timely reminder. I do make our bed each morning but have gotten away from the daily speed cleaning I used to do. I’ll be using my oven timer once again starting tomorrow!
I love making my bed to. Almost everyday. But I agree about feeling great to climb in a made bed at night.
I’m going to be anonymous here because I don’t want everyone to know I don’t make my bed. I used to make it every single day as soon as I got up, and then one day I read that leaving the bedclothes open allows the bed to air out. But more importantly for me (an asthmatic), it also encourages dust mites to die off as they like it snug and dark and moist in the carefully made bed. I breathe much better now when I am lying in bed, as I am allergic to dust mites. Apparently, dust mites live in every bed, so it isn’t a matter of house keeping.
Love this! Making the bed is a wonderful ritual. When things are organized and in order, my mind is clear and can focus on other things! Great reasons!
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I, too, tend to tidy up to keep my brain on straight, but despite that I was never able to make myself consistently make my bed.
Then we got a puppy who 1) liked to sneak onto beds during the day and 2) tended to shed coarse black hair wherever she rested.
Three years after our beloved puppy finally passed of old age, I still am half terrified if I realize I forgot to make my bed.
Now I am going to do my breakfast, once having my breakfast
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Great post! My husband and I have had similar situations with trading off being the stay-at-home spouse. We have the same views as you expressed up there, including your added note at the bottom. Right now we both work full time and the laundry does not always make it to the closet. Sometimes, I live out of the dryer. 🙂 Such is life… Thanks for writing/posting/reposting this!
I try to clean the house every couple of years, whether it needs it or not. Keeps me happy.
I am a new stay at home mom & things have become pretty overwhelming at times & I feel like I want to go back to work to escape the chaos. Reading this post has helped me realize that I am not alone & that we all have a our bad days. I love having a nice tidy house for the family to feel at peace in! Thank you for your post & I shall keep trudging along joyously for my family & I!
I totally understand. I think that we need to be more understanding and supporting of one another. I have a Masters Degree and worked prior to having my first baby, and decided to stay home. I have not regretted one bit, but some days the tiredness is so overwhelming that I am not the kind of mother/wife I want to be 🙁
I just want to thank you so much for giving all the reasons I’d give for why I keep my home clean, but can’t, because a dear lovely friend and has a disaster-area of a home and it would hurt her feelings. I feel like there’s so much out on the “mommy-web” about “oh, I don’t worry about the mess because why would I spend time cleaning that I could spend with my kids!!!….” and “if you have kids, you’re just going to have a big mess all the time, oh well!!” etc, etc. I think we neat people are more of a quiet presence, not wanting to hurt feelings or make anyone feel inferior, but still wondering how people can live peacefully in such chaos. Of course our home gets messy – I homeschool a elementary kid and jr. high kid – but the default is picked up. Just found your blog – am having fun exploring. thx!
Terrific article! I make my bed everyday and I love it! I love to walk into my bedroom & see a pretty bed!
My husband and I never have to wonder what is going on in our home when we are not there. Personal Home Management does everything with care and makes us feel as though our home is their #1 priority.http://www.personalhomemanagement.net/
I honestly believe keeping kid’s rooms orderly might make them smarter. If I cleaned up and rearranged her toys a little, my daughter noticed which items went together and played “smarter.” Meaning she didn’t just go in her room and throw toys around.
Also, if you are in the market, your house will sell A LOT faster if it is spotless. And you have a better chance of getting asking price. I did. Twice.
^
I have a beautiful home but it looks like a crime scene 🙁 It makes my whole life feel chaotic. I want to be like Carly and get pi$$ed & give myself a swift kick in the a$$ & fix it but I’m clearly too unmotivated (lazy?) for that. Maybe I’ll print this out and see if that helps 🙂
Well, this is my goal everyday. However, having an month old who is now teething and will not sleep longer than two hours at night, and a 25 month old who is so active, by the way they both have a cold now. My husband and I haven’t sleep well in weeks and are completely exhausted. I am now feeling so tired and today we will eat take out. I know I signed up to be a stay at home mom, but some days it is harder than I anticipated, especially when I haven’t slept. Great to all moms that are able to keep and do this list every single day.
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I love organized people who have a plan!You have an amazing writing style! I’m happy I found your blog and I think to visit it often! Keep posting!
Wow! This is just the most impressive blog i have ever read. I really just love it. I am writing an essay on why it is important to be clean and you just beat me to it! you know all there is. Anyways i really enjoyed this thank you so much!!!!!
You are so enthusiastic anonymous. I love it. And i agree with you, Ruth you have an amazing talent! just omg! i am 18 years old. i actually am very ocd about things but you seem waaaaay cleaner…
I appreciate this blog. Goodwill hunting was on my fb page and as I have a consignment store, I opened it. I went right to the “10 reasons I make my bed” because I do the same thing! I always did it because I like to see my bed all pretty every day and get into a fresh made bed every night as well, and I also read somewhere if you make your bed every morning, it helps you to make good decisions throughout the day. Good enough reason for me. I also can relate to the clean house, although I don’t always get to it. I appreciate seeing it in writing. It a great reminder for us workers or stay at home mom/workers to make our home nice and enjoy our surroundings. thanks for the info, i’m going in……(reading more….lol)
I make my bed just because it is THE quickest and easiset way to make a visible difference. I also do at least one load of laundry every day so I don’t have to dedicate an entire day to it. Clutter drives me berserk! My fam is used to me picking up after them. Now I’m trying to teach them by catching them at the moment they are done with something to tell them to put it away. Since I can’t be everywhere at once, I warned them that when they leave something out I will put it on their desk/bed so that it becomes their inconvenience. We’re slowly improving. Now if I could just consistently keep up with the dishes. . .
One big “YUP!!” Love all of it. Especially the creative part.
All I can say is WOW! This entire post could have come out of my mouth (except unfortunately the stay at home part) No one I know has ever understood how I feel about this! They all think I am crazy OCD. I have always strived for perfection and control to make up for other areas of my life. I put very high expectations on myself. It isnt always easy for those around me, but if things are out of place I am unable to relax! I found you through Edie (Life in Grace) and I am so glad I did!! I just ordered and received your new book! Can’t wait to read it!
I really like this post. One of my friends posted it last year on facebook and that is how I found out about LWSL. I did Ruth’s 31 days of de cluttering last October which helped my house tremendously. It made me feel a lot freer too, not to be weighted down by all that mess. I just started homeschooling my kids this week and my house has never been cleaner! We get up, have breakfast, get dressed and do miscellaneous chores for about 15 minutes before we start school. So nice to have school in a tidy house. The kids have really gotten on board with keeping the house clean. In fact, my daughter told my husband, “You forgot to push your chair in.” I also have a daily chart of certain chores to do in the morning and evening. My laundry schedule is also on that chart. It has made my life so much easier!
I definitely do these things. I have four kids and if I don’t stay on too of the clutter it could be totally out of control in two days. I am a SAHM and too feel it’s my “job”. It does sometimes get overwhelming I am constantly rearranging closets and things to make things work for us better and more efficiently.
Ѵivement un autre artiϲle
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what struck me most is the way we are looked to our moms and grandmas and followed their example
mom always made her bed she was cleaner then any of us girls will ever be she is my hero and I will
miss her forever, she instilled many great values in us. the thought of not taking care of he family never would have entered her mind. I live by her rules all my life as I move into my 68 yr I realize how lucky I am to have a made bed. so kids go clean your room love mom.
Great post but I don’t make my bed till later in the day. I throw back the covers and let it cool down and let the air get to it… those dust mites love warm moist conditions ……. then I make it.
I agree with this so much, as another stay at home mom who keeps the house clean….I always see those sayings for the wall “excuse my messy house, we’re making memories” or whatever… I disagree so much… we have a house full of fun and love and we make memories and messes. Our messes just get cleaned up.. I don’t think anyone’s life is as busy as they say that they can’t take time to pick up and straighten up. My kid has responsibility but so do I. You can’t put it all on your children or busy life… I have pride in my life and home and it shows when you walk through my door.
you are so motivating! If I get just 1 thing done around the home when I first wake up its make the bed. It honestly gets me moving to do more! I realize if a made bed makes THIS much difference imagine another 15 mins. Works every time! I noticed that beautiful blue wall color in your bedroom photo. Would you happen to know the color?
I’ve been trying to get out of my procrastinating habit for 3 years now. This is perfect. Instead of focusing on my procrastination, I should just focus on my reasons to want a clean home. I think, not getting bit by spiders, and to reduce my dust mite allergy is good enough reason to do this.
My husband was an only child that never had to do any house work. Well we had four boys and he never made them help do anything. Inside and then later outside. He made me stop getting on to them about doing chores or putting things in the wrong place. We have been married for 30 years and I have been a stay at home mother 23 years. We home schooled. He made our oldest start school in the third grade. It hurt me and my son when he made him start school. Taking him away from me that way was wrong. Anyways back to the house, I do remember him helping with things but one thing that I insisted on was the trash. I lived in the house with five guys and was not going to take out the trash. Well one day I got sick of it and carried nine big black trash bags out to the road. He had told me around about this time that there was no need to clean because it would just get dirty again. I do not like feeling like a maid. Clean the house is the responsibility of everyone that lives in the house. It is not the mothers job to clean the house by herself.
I feel the same way, if I don’t do the laundry or putter a little I feel out of sorts.
Thank you so much for the post. I make my bed every day. I’m glad that there are others who are doing and have done it for years! I often wondered why, my parents were strict and orderly, I went to a private school, same principals, and evently ended up in the military. Nothing but a structured background, but being orderly brings more peace to my soul and I have time to think about the other daily life interruptions. Enjoy each day, it’s a blessing. Thanks for the article…very interesting.
Perfect post and I agree with you on everything you have written. BUT, I do want to say that as a single mother of two boys while working full time, this type of organization is extremely important. I could not function without the sometimes extreme level of organization I created in my life and in my home. Fortunately I am able to have a cleaning lady every 2 weeks and other necessary services because I just do not have the time, but becoming ultra-organized saves me countless time each and every day! Looking around at a clean and organized home makes all of us less stressed and more productive.
I don’t know how old this blog is…. To be honest I didn’t even look… But I LOVE IT. I am not the only stay at home mom in my little group but I am one of the few that view it in ways very similarly to you… My husband works out of town 4 on three off and the last thing I want for him is to come home from he time away to a messy house and a sink full of dishes…. He works his tail off to keep me at home for our kids and it’s my job to keep the home … Period…. I have this blog post open on my phone and when ever I am slacking or lacking I take a few and read over it to remind myself what and why!
I have read this so many times. Love it! Thank you!
I love this post. It just makes me feel like things are in order in my home when the bed is made.
So true!
Well done! Keeping our home clean, tidy and organized is vital to make you feel good and people will be more inclined to hang out in your house if it is a pleasant place to be. Its nice to have everything nice and clean.
I must agree with you!I just want to add one, Keeping our house clean is essential for health safety and if we make things done, it feels happy and comfortable.
I loved your comment about making your bed! I still remember being in a talk by a psychologist shortly after I graduated from college back in 1975. She was one of those “progressive thinkers” who commented, “Why bother to make your bed in the morning? You’re just going to get back in it. If you don’t want to make your bed, who cares?” I responded, “Because if the bed is unmade, the whole house looks messy.” She asked me if that was me speaking or my mother (she obviously had mother-issues). I told her it was me. I was 27 at the time. It’s refreshing to hear another young woman say the same thing.
Thanks for your insights and thoughts!
Great way to start the day. If you get nothing else done…. your bed is made!
Good morning all. The bedmaking and kitchen cleaning thing tells me how productive I am going to be during the day. When I do not make a bible study and an hour of power (what I call my morning whole house tidy) a priority, I find my self turning into a blob in front of the TV. I am no longer a stay at home mom, my girls have gone on to start adventures of their own. This sound freeing to those of you who are currently dedicating their lives to their kids, but it is not. It is a time of self discovery. I am right now in a weird spot, one I was not anticipating. However the road to self discovery (who am I beyond Mom and Wife) is being traveled. Because over the last 14 years I have lost my identity to Mom and Wife, I lost who I was. But back to the Bed Making and Hour of Power. In the last few days, I was drowning in studies (I am in a Master’s Program) so I decided to bypass the hour of power thinking it would give me an extra hour. You know what I ended up doing spending the time watching morning tv. What was worse I spent more than the hour. I was stuck. So the next day I made my quiet time and hour of power a necessity and I did better I was able to stay on track and complete my studies
If nothing else, the bed is a must. I think it’s because it takes up so much space in a room. Other things can be messy around it but it feels more in control. Having the lawns mowed gives me a similar feeling.
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Thanks for sharing this to all….
I make our bed everyday except when my husband is out of town. Don’t know why but I let it go when he’s gone. He usually makes it on the weekend. We both just like the feel better and it takes less than 2 minutes…
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I usually do not leave a response, however after reading through a few of the responses on Why I Make My Bed |10 Reasons I Keep My House Clean. I
actually do have 2 questions for you if you do not mind. Is it only
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complete urls of all your social networking sites like your Facebook page, twitter feed,
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You must Be a Beautiful Person, A giving person and a God Fearing person, you Have made my Day, your sweet words of wisdom will stay with my Heart forever. When you Have no Positive friends to talk to But only our Loving Lord and Savior, You want to never leave the house and never see no Body, You Have made me feel a Little Better, With your most wonderful (( Why I make My Bed Every Day.
Thank-you from the Bottom of my Heart. jannieburkeen@yahoo.com
When some one searches for his necessary thing,
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so that thing is maintained over here.
I have had to transition from stay at home mom to working mom (full time at the moment) I always used to keep the house clean and tidy but now there are not enough hours in the day. It’s still clean by others standards but not by mine. I agree with all your reasons above … it’s definitely harder to relax in a messy house.
I love that the little things can add up to big things. Making the bed is an easy way to set the feel for the day. Teaching our kids to do the same is a simple way to help our kids understand responsibility too.
This is very underrated and I haven’t really realize how important this simple task is. It is a good head start to feel motivated on cleaning your house.